4.24.16

Re: autonomy

It is my deepest, most honest, yet most unreachable desire to be fully yielded to You. It gives me the greatest hope and sorrow to think about because I carry with me the weight of so much failure. And I see again today with refreshed vision, that I’m always trying to do it on my own, fixing my eyes on that goal instead of You. You never asked me to strain harder, to feel heavy, guilty. I need only look at you, pray hard, and let go. I don’t know how long it will take for you and I to break loose that lie from my mind and heart—that I have something to boast about and trust within myself. It runs deep inside me, much deeper than I ever thought.